Veterans Day

The working title for a space that should’ve been filled some time ago was “The Power of Words”. Although that “some time” seemed to be continuously delayed, as days went by and there was always something else to do. Which didn’t include sitting at the computer to write out an idea for the blog.

Don’t get me wrong. Writing is not a “chore” for me. It is a cathartic moment which allows me to reflect, think, relax and forget about issues which weigh down the everyday moments. And there are plenty of those last… So, then, why is it so difficult to find the moment or time to actually get this done?

The “working answer” is “I don’t know”. Those of you who have endured this blog over time (thank-you!!) know it began as a run, down memory lane (try “run down” without the comma and it changes the meaning- perhaps a reality check) and as such, it went for the first 200 entries or so. After that, other issues began to pop up once in a while. Wally’s Pond, well received conspirator Cheito - my “friend-cousin” from Hialeah, and others. Occasionally, a lost political comment. Although I really want to stay away from this last, being one of those issues that add weigh rather than remove it.

As the days kept creeping forward, we came to Veterans Day’s doorstep. There is much to be said about those who put their all on the line on behalf of their flag and country. On behalf of all of us. Yes, I did my part, small as it were. From my post at Naha Wheel in Okinawa I did what I could to support those who were in “Nam” at that time.

In our company, we regularly received youngsters who were coming back older than they should ever be at that age, somehow shared their nightmares and managed to nurse some of them on their way back to the US. And some who were passing through, on their way to the front (as it were), we tried to prepare as well as we could (informally) for what was to come. Those memories I don’t think have found their way unto these pages, and I do not believe they will. Some things are best left in the past.

But every Veterans Day some of those faces I still remember. The tiredness, the fear of anticipation in the face of those who were going, the jaded, horrified view of life lived reflected in the eyes of those who were coming from VN. These soldiers did what they had to do, in a never declared war; a “conflict” which meant they fought, literally, with one hand tied behind their back. But they went and fought, anyway.

I respect those soldiers (and I use this noun as a generic term, to include all those men and women who served and serve in all branches of service) and all who came before and who have come after them, who have served and too often not survived, for doing their sworn duty to our country, under the cover of our flag. They all served. Some because they had to, most because they felt the obligation to defend our belief system, our culture, our achievements. Our country. Regardless of why, these soldiers served, each in their capacity. And for this service, we say Thank You. With honor and respect.

Respect the meaning of Veterans Day. Remember these men and women served so you and I could have the right to disagree, complain, and call on those in power. Feel free to do so. Do it strongly but with respect and you will be honoring the service and sacrifice of these men and women.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:
• Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!
• Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora
• Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

From Wally’s Pond… Again…

This will become entry #400 for this blog. It started late 2009; a means to pass convalescencing time from my cancer treatment and the first of my hip replacement surgeries...

Yet, as time went on, it became a rolling memory book, confessional, travelogue and just a place where most (I have to be honest and say not all…) feelings have been shared. Supposedly, someone who writes must be willing to bare his/her inner self and put everything on the pages (well, OK, the e-filings) for all to see. Not my case. It is still my belief that some aspects of the mind -such as they may be- are private and should remain so.

After all is said, it is often a rudderless flight of fancy (nice term for aimless ramblings?) precisely the one that takes us to the most amazing destinations.

Near death experiences… are they real?   ”a personal experience associated with death or impending death. Such experiences may encompass a variety of sensations including detachment from the body, feelings of levitation, total serenity, security, warmth, the experience of absolute dissolution, and the presence of a light.” (WIKIPEDIA)

Also from Wikipedia and according to Bruce Greyson, the general features of the experience include impressions of being outside one's physical body, visions of deceased relatives and religious figures, and transcendence of egotic and spatiotemporal boundaries.              NOTE: I did try to look up the word “egotic” and by inference (for there is no such word in the thesaurus) it refers to the boundaries of self, within one’s own mind.

Over the years there have been occasional opportunities to talk about these transcendental (too much? … well… OK… interesting) issues with people of different faiths, races and backgrounds. Interestingly, there seems to be a relatively even split along the lines as to whether or not they believe in these near-death experiences.

Those who believe in this possibility, tell me that these visions are not always present. My questions: Who is subject to them and why? I have not found a convincing answer to those questions. Yet, in three occasions there were conversations between two individuals who said they had lived through them and myself. Nothing strange, esoteric or especially telling about them. Normal, run of the mill folks. One in India, one in Spain and one right here in the US. Two in their mid-forties, the other one over 60 years of age. Their account was very similar. Diffuse visions, people shapes with inner lights, a feeling of familiarity and, above all, peace. Both also told me that their vision of life thereafter changed to a better acceptance of circumstances and clearer definition of purpose.

This posting is not meant as a study of probabilities or even possibilities. It just means to raise a questioning eyebrow and pose the plausibility of that moment. The moment when our soul or spirit has accepted the reality of imminent departure and is getting ready for the next step of the journey.

What is apparently a very common thread from all the studies (not counting my three conversations… right…) done on this matter, is that those who do come back (Yes, I know… those who do not come back could not answer the questionnaires…) have a radical attitude change towards life, expectations, and general attitude. Almost all change to a better understanding of purpose… and yes, my guys definitely supported this last turn.

There is a lot of reading material on this subject; there is a lot of time to be spent going through that material and I will devote some (not as much as I would like to, but…) time to this because it is a topic which interests me. Not only near-death experiences but also those who have been actually declared clinically dead, only to revive a few minutes later.

From as early a time in my life as I can remember, there have been far too many “happenings” around me not to take these type of issues seriously. I have had, for many years, an implicit acceptance on my part that logic can only explain what we can understand according to set parameters. What we don’t understand or have an acceptable explanation for, is outside that realm of logical order.

Does it mean it  is not real or not existent? No; to me, it means that it falls into the realm of belief and willingness to believe; it takes a jump of faith. And then, we hold on for the ride of a lifetime.

There’ll be more… I think…

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

A Shared Moment.

There are moments when words are not the solution. We can only hope that, in those moments, we know enough not to say anything foolish.

Often, I truly understand that I am indeed blessed. This goes beyond my successful bout against cancer and the incredible places and people I have met over the years. Beyond unexplainable survival(s) at times when I was totally unprepared to face unexpected and considerable foes. Add to this all the minor and major mistakes made along the roads and detours life has steered me through. It really adds up to something much like a miracle.

Today, at age 71, like many others I must work to meet my expenses. But, I am able to. And that’s a blessing too. For my work involves doing things I truly enjoy. Like doing the ESL classes. Teaching others to speak English so they can improve their lot and their families’ lot as well. Pretty much all of my students are Hispanic. Some with documents and full of ambition and some without documents and full of hope.

We discuss many topics in class. A few days ago, we talked about there being a special place each one would like to visit or go back to. And that was the homework for the weekend. To prepare to talk about that special place and share this with the class.

We came back on the following class and, after the usual bits of small conversation to get started, came tie for the presentation. Some talked about their home country and a special place thy hoped to go back to, some about other places only mythical to them. The ones in the travelogue pictures with all the allure only a good photo editor can muster. But this was their dream, and very valid to them. Hope is a very strong incentive for work.

Then we got to a young woman (early-mid 30’s -- yes, young. Remember my perspective…) who had just joined the class one week ago. She was a little hesitant and I assumed it was the effort to say her piece in English. And yes, it was that, but there was another reason as well.

-“I want to go back to Paris” “I was there early last year with my husband”

And, of course, we all said something along “that’s nice, what good luck to have been there”

And then she added, fighting back tears

–“He told me with a smile that I might have to come back alone” “We came back home and he was killed in a car accident last December” “We placed  a lock on the Bridge of Love (Pont Des Arts) and I want to go back to visit the bridge again”

There was silence after this and, mercifully, the clock reached the time to finish.

She lingered for a few moments and came to me to apologize for tearing up. I said to her “There’s no need to apologize” “There is no need to say anything” “As someone who has lost a very dear person to an accident as well, I can tell you that the time will pass, but his presence won’t as long as you have him in your heart and mind”

What else was there to say? Nothing.

 Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

Another Year... Some Thoughts

It’s about that time of the year when another 365 days of biological time-living have passed and I am compelled to sit, look at the computer’s blank page and let the moment wash over me, bringing forward all those semi-lost memories, languishing in the little reviewed drawers of my brain. Well, what’s left of it after 71 years of embattled endurance.

A year ago yesterday marked the arrival my 70^th birthday. A benchmark of sorts. So I guess yesterday, if the numeral order is to be believed (something I wish could be disproved occasionally) defined my 71^st birthday. Which, in sequence, actually means I am now living my 72^nd. Year… And, in turn, makes me the oldest member of my direct family’s oldest living generation. Hmmm… gets too complicated to look at the overall picture from that angle… lopsided.

In any event, one more year has passed. I have not been very loyal to my blog in this time, relegating it to a some-when thing; only if the pang of peripheral writer’s guilt showed up in my head… It is something I have tried to remedy but there are some issues to ponder… What direction should I follow? Originally, the blog came to life as a memory lane trip while my hip recovered from a replacement and my body adjusted to its first metal insert… and to radioactive fallout from cancer treatment… a conundrum of memories of life from childhood on.

A few (as few as possible) quasi-political entries and some opinionated ramblings have been a part of this 7+ years. My fren’ Cheito from “HaiAleeah” and his celebrated appearances and comments (his entries have drawn more reads than most others) the ramblings from “Wally’s Pond” and also those days when writing became an issue and the results showed it. Many candid memories have been included and many others have been not so candidly left out. There were peak months when the blog had as many as 600 “reads” worlwide and, lately, months of 5 or 6 hits, reflecting the lack of new entries… It has been a joy ride.

No, I am not saying good bye, nor is this a fare-thee-well musing. I have enjoyed writing and also have enjoyed those comments which kept me going at times of questionable enthusiasm. And yes, the ones that questioned moments of effervescent enthusiasm with the resulting non-directional ramblings.

This is an exercise of and for the mind. Writing is, somehow, my assertion to living, to having lived and to a continuance in this world. At least for now. As time goes on, there will be “new” memories and mixed in perhaps some of those left out. Guess I am not a “true” writer, since there is no total willingness on my part to share my “True Confessions”. In any event, predictable reaction to this would likely be… AND???

But, no matter… on we shall go. There will be new entries, with not much order or consistency. But with a lot of love.

After all, surprise is at the core of an interesting life, isn’t it?

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

There are Memories and then… There are Memories…

  Today, being Saturday and most things that needed to be done being so done yesterday, there was some time in which to do not much, so HBO was tuned to and a movie called “The Last of the Blonde Bombshells” caught my attention.  A simple musical I thought… easy to pass the time. Well, it was a musical -of sorts- with a top cast, including Dame Judi Dench and a singer I had not thought about for quite some time, albeit one of my years ago very favorites: Cleo Laine.

  Mind you, I didn’t know she was on the cast, it just happened along the way to a happy finish. The storyline is about an all-female (plus a male drummer with blonde wig and all) English swing band (“swing” as it pertained to those times) which had become famous during WWII. The movie is taking place in the present, so that long past story had taken place some 50+years ago, the plot switching back and forth between then and now. The main character somehow meets up again with drummer-boy (another story-within-the-story) and they set out to bring whatever is left of the band together again.  

  When they got to the singer, there was this older lady (well… we all get there sometime, don’t we?) who began to belt this number with an incredible low/mid-range voice. My little man brain (the one sitting somewhere back there inside my head) kept closing out the visual and concentrating on the sound part.

- “I know that voice!! It kept on repeating…”

- “But I don’t know that face, I kept answering…”

  The sound just kept coming and being enjoyed… Eventually, the movie came to its end and, out of total curiosity, I stayed on to watch the credits roll by…

  OMG!!! You fool!!! Her name appeared on the screen and in my memory banks… Cleo Laine… to me, one of the great jazz/blues singers/voices of all time.

  Along with her voice came memories of sitting by a pool somewhere, sipping a cool drink and listening to a cassette (Yes, a cassette, what of it???) with her voice trailing over the pool waters unto the sea and the sunset, skipping over a few palm trees along the ways …  “the little ordinary things every one ought to do…” from Ray Noble’s “The Very Thought of You”…

  I did a lot of long winded travel in the late 70’s into the mid 80’s. But it wasn’t all work… Once in a while, there were sublime moments when the world would graciously allow itself to fall away and there was only a drink, the whisper of the water, the sunset and the glorious sounds of Cleo Laine cleansing my soul.

There are memories and then… there are memories…

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

BGSA or AGSA???

Sometime in the future, in a non-denominational world, the ages of quick knowledge and enlightenment may be measured by the above little letters. What do these critters mean? I’m sure you ask…

These precious little letters mean no more and no less than… “Before Google Search Availability” and “After Google Search Availability”. Don’t laugh… there is a great cultural divide here.

If you are reading this, it’s likely you belong to a group of individuals who braved the world of academia with rulers, dictionaries, and… OMG!!!... Books! Yep… those ancient things which had pages to be turned, read, marked, annotated and underlined and then, when you were done with the year studies, they were resold to the next class of aspiring students. The value went up according to the quality of the notes and underlining which paved the way for an easier study time.

I think this crop of students, the “Goooglehead” generation, is privy to a lot of information we did not readily have. It could be said they are smarter because of this and because they can find out the answer to most anything with a few hits to the keyboard on their telephone and/or phablet and/or laptop. Perhaps. I agree that a pocket, electronic Wikipedia would have been a big help in our time. The Good Lord knows what trials and tribulations we went through at finals time; running to get the needed last minute information, going to the library (remember those?) and checking through the cards and the old records you could look at in those old viewers that rolled them in an almost unreadable screen.

On the other hand, there are elements which might be missing from the new picture. The process of learning and thereby assimilating the contents, the acquired patience needed to find sources, read them and cull the wanted information. A patience which comes in handy later in the real world, where not all is solved by stroking the keys of a computer. I have witnessed a high level of frustration in youngsters (Geesh… I’m sounding old) when they can’t get an instant answer and resolution.  

There is another and, perhaps more important area, where overall development could be lacking. Early social life. For many, socialization comes through chat groups, not through face to face interaction. In the usual social media, what counts in the life of teens and young adults are the “likes” they may get to a posting. No matter how silly this posting may be. There have been far too many cases where a “dislike” brings on a depressive state. They become a symbol of rejection. These internet surfers have not developed the emotional and personality tools which would help them deal with the perceived slights.

Yes, I know. I come from a complex, yet simpler time. Complex because we had to learn to interact with others and this was not easy or simple. Simpler time because we were not overwhelmed with an ever-expanding universe of possibilities at our fingertips. We looked for what we needed and didn’t get the surrounding garbage that today comes with all searches.

Is this going to change? Not likely. Actually, the next generation of “smarter-than-thou” helpers is already on its way to us and our children, who gleefully want to be the first in line to get the new goodies.

It is their new world and we, the old geezers, created and handed it to them… Now we are becoming bystanders in the all-out virtual world race…

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

Once Upon a Time in Insurance Land...

Many years and moons ago I began selling insurance…

Back in the early 70’s there was this time when I was not a righteous member of the gainfully employed crowd (only smirk if you’ve never been there) and a friend asked me to go to an interview with a local agency of a major insurance company.

- “What, sell Insurance?” asked I with a look of surprise on my face.

- “Yes,” he answered, “That, sell insurance… and, why not?”

I have many defects (Quiet there in the gallery… no need to agree so readily!!) but fear of the unknown is not one of them.  I went to the interview and received an offer to start working immediately… well, OK… that’s the same offer made to most any walking body that might sashay into that office back then… The decision was made to start selling this product, without understanding how much and how drastically my later life would change as a result.

The sale of insurance, as a profession, carried somewhat of a stigma back then and this was not lost on yours truly. But needs of food, shelter and daily countenance do not understand the concept of “stigmas” so, I went on to my training period with The Prudential Insurance Company, affectionately known as “The Rock”. What’s more, this was a debit insurance office, which was the then more modern euphemism for the small, monthly collected old industrial insurance.

What a collection of characters I had the chance to meet!! Phil, the retired army captain, straight as an arrow, physically and mentally. Then there was “Pinky”, the office perennial sales leader, along with his manager Salvatore. Two stalwart old school Italians (amongst several others in their group) who were loud, funny and friendly.  And I can’t forget “Vinnie from The Rock” tall, gangly, orange mop head who was the archetypal salesman… Green pants, loud shirt and checkered sports coat to go with an incredibly bubbly personality… OK, overbearing personality….

That was the beginning of my Insurance career. A hotbed of activity, visiting neighborhoods, collecting premiums which went down to as little as $.50 per month (yes, fifty cents) while talking to clients and their neighbors trying to dredge up new business… I actually survived that office, mostly because I was guided by a good human being and knowledgeable leader by the name of Bernie… Eventually I learned to sell larger policies than those the office could accommodate and went on to “greener” pastures.

Some 44 years later, after holding down many different positions within the insurance business which ranged from sales, to sales management and corporate director and consultant, I am now “semi-retired”. The wonderful years spent in many countries around the world because of tenures with international companies, are part of a web of memories which keep most of these instances alive and warm. And I say “most” because there are definitely some instances which are probably best left for the “delete” bin of the mind.

It is said by those who know more than I do -who make up a rather large contingent- that a person, in the latter years of his/her life tends to become an amalgam of all those experiences lived along the way. I can only hope that I may have managed to nurture the better experiences into my makeup, culling those which could leave a negative component.

Well, I could only hope this is true….

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!

·       Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com