In life we deal with many issues.
Some are run of the mill, some are not, and others fall into that “more
difficult to manage” status; often, we don’t really know how to go about
dealing with these.
-
“You must wield a steel claw covered by a silk glove”
It
was late 1973 and I, living then in Connecticut, had started working with a young
life insurance company out of Miami, as an independent agent. This was the
first time I came across a fully prepared (canned,
literally) sales process. The government had recently passed a law allowing
individuals to purchase a retirement account which could be qualified, just
like a pension plan, for deductions of the premiums from the income tax basis. The
company had an average product with an outstanding presentation.
We
carried around a self-contained machine, which showed a full 18-minute story as
to why the viewer should not only rush to get this qualified plan, but gave him/her little choice… My job
was to present them with the short movie and, when finished, simply ask two
questions…
- “Isn’t
this a marvelous idea for your future financial wellbeing?”
And…
-“would
you like to start your own tax deductible savings program with $25, $40 or $50 per month?”
This
presentation was so effective, we came to call the closing “the steel claw
dressed in silk”. The silk made the presentation warm, soft and non-threatening but, once the
“claw” got into you, it simply would not let go.
I
thought about this yesterday while mentally going over several issues, and one in particular, which
have taken place over the last few weeks. Some were problems and/or
consequences that had to be faced, others were emotional issues and no less
demanding. In fact, these were easily the more difficult to handle.
The
analogy came to me that, as we sail (well,
OK, crawl along) through life, we must develop a mindset to manage the more
difficult moments and decisions which in many ways is like that steel claw.
When dealing with these issues and the people who are involved, there has to be
a level of empathy, warmth and understanding. This is the silk cover.
Non-threatening, listening, fuzzy warm.
Yet,
when the actual “bone of contention” is identified, the mind must act like a
steel claw. Clamp on to it and don’t let go, until a resolution is accomplished,
or a decision is made. The years lived have taught me many things (I give them that, at the very least, they have constantly tried to); and understanding that not
all have been “good” teachings, those which can help me become a better person
well … should be listened to.
A
most important one is that when an issue that bears attention comes up, it must
be attended. To do this the right way, the mind has to first identify, listen and determine what the cause of the problem may be and, once it’s identified, act
like that “steel claw” that will not allow its pray to get away. Whether it is
a business or a personal decision, it must be given full attention and
resolution.
Will
it always bring the desired results? Guess what? ... Sorry, not guaranteed.
And
remember; although leaving an issue to solve itself may be a viable solution at
times, in more cases than not it will not be the best road to follow. Even this non-action
decision requires an evaluation of the true core of the problem and the
understanding of the outcome probabilities of “not doing”.
It’s
easier to sidestep the tough decisions and we have all, at one time or another, been guilty of that.
It’s just less confrontational to slide through than to face the “enemy at
hand” head on. Yet, when we do this, it then tends to become a bigger, more
damaging situation and much more difficult to control.
Hence,
the silk and steel claw. We can’t get away from making those tough decisions. At
least not intentionally. But to be able to make them in the best possible
manner, we do have to train ourselves to have as tough as possible a mindset; to be honest with ourselves and to know enough to have a trusted person or
persons who can be of help in those occasions when we don’t feel up to the task.
Or
when we think or feel we can’t be clear minded and fair because it is a
personal decision which may involve ourselves or someone close. Part of that “steel
claw” , set on an automatic pilot of sorts, should openly review and question your own mind process on a regular basis as it may analyze issues relating to others. When you can make that happen, then you will know you have as honest a mind as you could possibly have,
capable of looking fairly at the
issues at hand.
Still
… no guarantees!!
Be
Well … Be Back!!!
Final Notes:
· Pray
for those who are
fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every
request is heard and counts!!
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