This is the most common excuse we hear (and utter) every day,
whenever something happens not according to our wishes…
Actually, when all is said and done, life is much
fairer than most of us would be, were we in a position to wield that
unforgiving power of fate. Of this I am sure…
A virtual reality check comes in to play whenever I
feel inclined to use the above mentioned excuse for self pity… Invariably, it
tells me that whatever it is that is happening, it is happening because I –yes,
I (or you, if you prefer) and none
other- brought it about. A decision made or one not made along the way, conveniently
ignoring warnings which are sent on a regular basis into all our seemingly
dulled receptors during our happy way to the mishap.
If you, who are now reading (I hope) this, have also read a number of entries along the way, you
do understand that often my rambles take on a life of their own and go into
different directions… and I do not try to say or even imply they are all truly
coherent… but… they become a part of the writings. They reflect my mind (what’s left of it, as my son used to say –jokingly,
I prefer to think) and how it tends to work…
We all make many mistakes along the way (Ohh so you also forgot to read the "Instructions For This Life" manual?) and we all,
at one point or another will try and pass some –or all- of what we call “fault”
to another person, often an innocent recipient of our own inadequacies. Seems
this has become a universal game at which most of us have become very
proficient. Think about this…the last time you made a decision which turned out
to be drastically wrong… when called to your attention, did you immediately say
“YES, it was MY fault” or… did you spend the next few minutes desperately
trying to find an alternate recipient for the responsibility of it all… Be
honest now….
Learning to say “yes” and “no” at the appropriate
times will take away many opportunities to get involved in issues which will,
for sure, take a wrong turn along the way. Actually, it is easy to say “yes”…
we tend to want to pleaser for in doing so, we are more liked… Saying “no”
firmly when needed to is an art which takes a lot of learning and soul
searching. Most of us never learn to say “no”… it is not easy. At best, over
along span of years, life will teach us over and again that this is a trait we
must acquire… yet we keep on ignoring these lessons.
“Life” is not unfair… it is actually the fairest of
all judges; it will hand down decisions based on what we have done or what we
have failed to do… we cannot really hide anything from this very stern judge,
try as we may.
My comments are only based on my experiences and
looking back to those moments when I have also said … “life is unfair”… on
trying to be honest and fair myself, I have to –often grudgingly- accept that
whatever happened was the direct result and reaction to something I had done,
or failed to do.
Today, I can actually say “no” when I think this is
the right answer. It has not been easy to get here; the road is littered with
far too many mistakes… On the other hand… the mistakes we have made (and will make) along the way create the
experiences that tell us who we are and where we may be going… of course,
making new and delightfully different mistakes on those new roads... hmmm!!!
Be
Well … Be Back!!!
Final Notes:
- Pray for those who are fighting an illness
which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard,
and counts!!
- Follow us on Twitter …
@RJAsPandora
- Any comments please send to otherboxp@yahoo.com
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