TODAY’S QUOTE

Note:

As part of a page I publish on behalf of my English as Second Language tutoring services, I incorporate a weekly quote and then give my own impression of what this quote means. Today's quote seems to be important enough and one which -even though generated some two centuries ago- is very present.

Comes from Henry David Thoreau.   He was an American naturalist, essayist, poet, and philosopher. His best-known work is “Walden”, and his essay “Civil Disobedience” is an argument for disobedience to an unjust state.

“THINK FOR YOURSELF,

OR OTHERS WILL THINK FOR YOU

WITHOUT THINKING OF YOU.”

MY TAKE:

We have all become involved in the massive social networking movement. As a result, many people are -at most times of the day- embedded into their telephones, ignoring all other activities. All the latest trends imposed by their favorite person(s) and all the latest thinking presented by the same group. The most important issue is to be perceived as “the same”, not as someone who “does not fit in”. Think alike, look alike, speak alike, dress alike. The phone, tablet, and computer are fast trading their position from that of being useful tools to that of becoming the masters of the younger generations. And some who are not so young.

For far too many, these instruments have become their “thinking partner”. But in accepting the opinions of others as their own, instead of that of a “collaborating” partner or just another opinion, they are taking someone else’s thought process and allowing it to become their own, implicitly. Without questioning, or even contemplating the possibility of it being based on a false premise, or on a premise with which the receiver might not even agree if understood.

Today’s quote comes from a person who lived about two centuries ago. No phones or tablets or computers then. Yet, the message is even more important in today’s environment. It just tells us that we, as people, must remain on guard and must protect that which is our most innate asset: our mind and its thinking process.

Does it mean that we cannot accept or listen to someone else’s opinion? Not at all. A consensus (meeting of the minds) is an important tool to use when it is called for. But the issue at hand is that each one of us must think through each situation and come to our own conclusion, not just blindly accept someone else’s.

Even if that person is an “influencer” from social media. He or she is getting paid to make you think like they do, and follow the trends that will make money for, or bring power to, their sponsors. Don’t forget that.

Think of what you are told, think about the problems at hand, think about what you want to accomplish, and how you can get there. Map your own road, don’t let others map it for you. Those who you allow to think for you, will determine what is favorable for them and not necessarily for you.

Yes, be a modern rebel. Think. Think through issues. And make your own decisions. You may take someone else’s ideas into consideration and if these coincide with your own and your goals, then incorporate them into your life. But do not do so without truly understanding their origin, their intent, and how they will impact you and your life.

Successes and failures will be a part of your life and of all our lives. But when these are our own successes and failures, they will become an intrinsic part of who we are and the core of our maturing and growing.

THINK!!!

Fading Memories -2

 CHAPTER II – A JOURNEY STARTS.

Usually, at the start of any trip, there is a degree of preparation involving its scope, destination, means of travel, time involved, anticipated end results, and cost. Especially that potentially ever-expanding detail: cost. For this particular trip, most of these preparations were foolishly glossed over by the anticipated end results factor. 

After a couple of phone calls to specific “international business” contacts (Question: what would we do without these dearly beloved “contacts”? … Answer: probably lead a normal life) it turns out that, given an existing set of parameters, there was -at the time- a market for this currency where good money could be made.  

When I asked for a “general indication” of what “good money” meant, I was told that based on the amount, availability of the goods and/or buyers, cost of transport, and contract details, the general commission would be 2% of the total face amount value of the transaction. This would be equally divided between two parts: those representing the seller and those representing the buyer. Then, each half would be further subdivided according to internal agreements.

After a quick calculation, the total commission would be more than whatever amounts of money we had seen together before. There would be many pitfalls along the way, before getting to that coveted prize. Some we could foresee, most hit us head-on as we, literally, explored these byways.

As said somewhere above... Anticipated results overshadowed all other considerations. 

To proceed with this project, we had to go to South America and meet with the person who had access to the offered product. We set up a meeting, flew down, and met with John (none of the names other than our own are real. In order to protect the guilty).

John was an unemployed office worker in his early 50’s and, as it turned out (in this instance and many others along the road) he was just somebody being used by whoever actually knew the person who owned the “buried”(literally) treasure. This last person did not wish to be known; he probably knew this was a (very) long shot deal at best and did not wish to be exposed or known as a part of this endeavor. 

He probably wasn’t bothering with too many legalities either. 

To be continued ... I think...

Fading Memories

 

There are moments in life when decisions are made;  sometimes these are not well thought out and the resulting ripples become an undertow, then a veritable tsunami of issues and life-changing consequences. I am not sure I will ever finish these memories, but ...

CHAPTER I – THE BEGINNING.

The year was 1997 and the month, I believe was November. Something that would impact the decision to come had happened some 2 months before. Almost like the stage being set by that great force in the infinite, for what was to be the future direction of our lives. My employer and I had parted ways. The whys and wherefores of this are not relevant to this tale. What is, is the fact that I was (un)gainfully unemployed when the aforementioned conversation took place. Even though my severance packet (didn’t quite make it to “package”) had been generous (no doubt due to some degree of guilt on the part of my employer), the cost of living and daily expenses index sent us a strong signal these funds would not last forever.

Just about that time, my wife received a call from a friend and old insurance colleague who was visiting Miami, where we then lived. After the initial pleasantries, long time no see you and “how are uses” were duly completed, he asked us to meet him since he had something that only “we (meaning my wife, and I by extension) could do”. 

We met at a Howard Johnson on US1 in Miami (well, it was really in Coral Gables…) and the usual “what have you been doing since we last saw you” exchanges were not interesting enough to be repeated here. So, I won’t. Then we got to the core of the pitch. 

- “I have access to a cache of currency which needs to be sold” He said.

- “What currency are we talking about and where is it?” I replied. 

By this time, I had already been doing some (very) minor work in the “international trading world”, getting my feet “wet”, so his answer did not initially raise eyebrows. After all, this was nothing but an exploratory conversation, right?

- “It’s a load of Iraqi Dinars and it is in a buried container in South America” then he continued -“We know there are buyers in Europe who are willing to buy them at “official” exchange rates.” 

This is where you, the reader, come in and with a totally incredulous look on your face, say… HUH??... YOU HAVE WHAT??... WHERE??

In truth, that should have been my response as well. It wasn’t. A combination of a nascent knowledge about this business, with the “I don’t really want to sound dumb” syndrome (long since overcome... fully) held my reaction to my innards and stopped me from asking this last set of questions. Chalk one more instant to the “I’d like to have another shot at that moment, but I know I can’t” syndrome (we are full of these syndrome things this morning…) more easily recognized as “regret”.

 We agreed to go along with the proposal.

And that moment, our future became redrawn in the cosmic sense. And in the real world too.

to be continued... maybe...

75 Years Ago.

 It was 75 years ago yesterday that I first saw the light of this world. Not truly remembering the whereabouts of my previous experiences as a living entity, I guess it was decided to do my best to enjoy the habitat into which I had just been delivered. 

I suppose there was a degree of celebration, for I was the first child born to my mother (others would follow) and the first grandson born to my maternal grandparents (and yes, several other grandchildren would follow suit). Yes, I am being somewhat specific, for I never actually had the chance to play on (hang from?)  the other branch of my family tree. But that is another story… or, perhaps a little later in this one. 

There really isn’t much I can pass on to you about my first few years. There seems to be the usual, well-documented early life void in my memory banks when it comes to this lovely, carefree period of one’s life. Yet, a brief moment of some 15 minutes during the early part of my second year became embedded into my mind and memory, to the chagrin of my elders who for a long time insisted I could not remember such a thing, not at that tender age. 

That was the afternoon when, right after lunch, my father came to my crib and said his goodbyes, mentioning at some point he was “going out of town” and that we would see each other again on Saturday. I remember that image and those sounds to this day. What he may have failed to mention, or perhaps mumbled over, was that it would be some 17 years before that Saturday reunion would come around.

Oh well… all in all, that should not be the defining (and only) memory of my early childhood.  Do I smell a budding trauma somewhere in there? 

The interesting thing about this journey called life is that it tends to follow its own path while allowing us to believe we are breaking new ground. We really don’t know the tumbles and falls we will suffer and the direction changes (usually quick and not very gentle) we will have to somehow maneuver around and do our best to survive. And then, let’s not talk about the outright head-on crashes we do live through on this bloody road. 

My mother and grandfather (as a surrogate father, none could have been better) did their best to create a handsome, uplifting, well-mannered, well-studied, and smooth-talking young man. But they got me instead. They tried their best and, if I were to be honest (Ok, I am being honest… what do you want from me? This is not easy… I always thought I was as close to perfection as possible) that project was far from finished when the political tides of life changed the course (one of many changes to come) of our existence. That person (me) was still a few years away from the ready stage. 

So now… 75 years later, a few million miles of travel time, 51 countries under my belt, and far too many falls taken and mistakes made, I have learned that the only reality at any given point in life is that there is much more to learn. Always much more. Perhaps one lifetime is not enough. 

But I do thank those people who were a part of my early steps; those who somehow gave me a base platform where I could plant my two feet as firmly as possible, grab some impulse and continue on this journey. They loved me and did their very best; I loved (love) them back and -somehow and surprisingly- managed to learn a good number of “how-to’s” from them. This helped along the way; especially during times all I had to go on, were those memories they instilled in me. 

Happy Birthday Me!! 

Be well, Be Back!!

REMEMBER to like and follow the page… share it with your friends.

Be Well … Be Back!!! 

Final Notes:

·        Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·        Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

CUANDO UN AMIGO SE VA… WHEN A FRIEND IS GONE…

Some 22-23 years ago, I met this guy in the midst of a business transaction. One of the many guys met and one of many transactions that I would try to complete in the course of time.  Also, one of the same many that would fail to produce results.

That first meeting was uneventful. Almost irrelevant you might say. It happened in Zurich, Switzerland, and we were both there trying to pursue a possibility; a dream which, as dreams are wont to do, can disappear in a wisp, a word, a thought. Leaving no trace behind. 

We had little chance to speak since we represented different interests at the time. But the stage was set. It seemed we were of a mind, of a different set and more dedicated to truly resolving the puzzle, than most of those with whom we had to deal. The average guy’s interest was geared only to cashing in whenever possible and at whatever cost... to someone else, preferably.

It was a year later we met again. This time in Paris and working the same interests. We stayed at a small, neighborhood hotel, and had a chance to get to know each other. He, speaking Portuguese and some French, I Spanish, English and less French. All in all, we communicated very well. There were times (often, it seemed) during this stretch of some 5 months in France when we pooled our resources and were able to go to the corner coffee shop (Parisian style) and have pizza and wine. These were opportunities to share stories and histories… and an excellent environment in which to grow a lasting friendship.

Early one evening I went to his room to pick him up to go to a meeting and saw several medicine bottles on his nightstand. When I asked him about this collection, he shrugged and said… “It was the years of diving in the polluted waters of Sao Paulo’s Bay (Brasil) to clean up”. He owned a company charged with cleaning up the mess on the bottom of the bay, next to the spill outlets. “We had to use strong chemicals and, despite our using special suits, these eventually got into our systems”. As a result, he was dealing with several issues not usually seen until much later in life. He was 38 at the time. Previews of problems to come.

Over the next couple of years, while still dealing with the same issues and walking the same corridors of life, we would meet every so often and were able to nurture and maintain a good, interest-free friendship. 

Then, as often happens in life, our ways parted. He remained in Europe, dabbling still in these off-center businesses and transactions, I came back home to The US due to the constant failure and accompanying frustration of not accomplishing my goal, as well as the number of shady characters and practices I had come across in trying to do so. A couple of years later, I was diagnosed with cancer and also had to undergo a couple of major surgeries to replace painfully malfunctioning hips.

After the surgeries and in the process of convalescing from my last hip replacement, a friend suggested that I start a blog as a way of using my inability to roam around freely, for a while, anyway. So, this magnificent piece of literary… don’t even say it… something was born. Along with it, I began to dabble more frequently on FB, creating my page and reaching out to friends. 

Low and behold! One day, while reviewing some comments, there was a note from my long-lost friend, after several years of not having any communication. We retook our friendship as if no time had gone by. He had remained in Spain, had developed a secondhand clothing business, and then had sold it (badly, it turned out) to retake the “old business”.  A business I had literally left behind due to my health issues. At this time, I was already managing several classes of English as a Second Language and had little time for other things. Especially those which had been a frustrating, damaging, and debilitating waste of time, money, and health. Of course, he asked me to help him, for he was dealing with this alone. 

I did end up helping him with documents and conversations, especially those which needed to be done in English, but was very clear I did this to help him as a friend, not because I believed in what was being done. So, for the last five years or so, we have been in constant communication, more so after his health began failing and his outlook became grim. During these years and thanks to Skype, WhatsApp, Google, and others, we had many, many face-to-face conversations. Not always about business. Over time we became virtual brothers. Literally.

During the last couple of years, he was in and out of the hospital, his health growing worse and his body weaker. Luckily, his older daughter was able to come to him from Brasil and become his mainstay and companion. Over this period, I felt that we were approaching the end of this relationship, at least on this physical plane. 

Last Saturday morning I received an early morning WhatsApp call. His daughter had called me to put him on the phone. One last time. He was in the hospital and the Doctors had said there was not much else to do but wait. He was in bed, covered up to his neck but, having known him all these years I quickly realized he had little left. 

- “Raf… I wanted to say goodbye”. “My heart is just giving up. I am tired” “Thank you for your friendship, know I love you as a brother. Until next time”. 

There wasn’t much I could say except… - “Go in peace brother; I love you”. 

His life ended on Sunday morning my time. Peacefully. 

Rest In Peace my dear friend Ronaldo. May you be free of suffering and pain now. 

September 9, 2021

REMEMBER to like and follow the blog… share it with your friends.

 Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·        Pray for those who are fighting an illness that may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·        Any comments, please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

Can We Have Our Democracy Back... Please?

NOTE: This piece was originally written some 7 years ago. I am now in the process of choosing several pieces which will go into a compendium for possible publishing. That means I am reading anew most of those written along the way and, in reading this one, it hit me how it is that time passes on, but the apparent futility of the human mind (when it truly wants to be futile) does not change. What do you think?

Everyone wants a little piece of the pie, and everyone wants to have their 5 minutes of fame…

We live in a country that was founded on very basic principles. There would be no royalty, no feuds. A duly elected government where all would be equally represented. Everyone would have the same possibilities and each individual would have the opportunity to pursue those very possibilities, according to his/her capabilities.

That was some two hundred years ago. The world has changed since then. It has become much more complicated, faster, smaller in a way. We now know what happens on the other side of the world as it actually happens. Whether we want to, or not. 

We have grown, mostly along with the rest of the world. Scores of nations have come and gone -and some come again- in that time, but we persevere. We are here. A little bigger around the waist and perhaps with less hair than years ago when it was customary to wear a wig. As we grew, along the way we also learned to speak “with forked tongue” when needed, putting truth and transparency to the side in the process. We have become full of contradictions and of issues which beg to be resolved. But we are beginning to lack the courage, or the interest, to do so.

Our Democracy needs to be revamped, rethought and kicked in the rear so it can get going again… 

·         We need to be able to know in full what goes on in the hallowed halls of Congress and the Presidency… we pay the bills.

·         We should be able to access information which is often censured and/or “for somebody’s eyes only” but which impacts us…

·         We should be able to vote directly and not through committees…

·         Tax reform –a real one– is needed. We should all pay a personal/corporate reasonable flat tax, with minimum exemptions and deductions.

·         Our government types should be paid based on results, not promises. This, like any position, has responsibilities and should be accountable.

·         We should be able to read, learn and to express our thoughts about issues freely and truly… especially the "freely" part…

·         Church is a state of mind. Each one of us chooses to believe where we feel comfort and love –or not- and others should accept this… and vice versa…

·         Fanatics should only be found at concerts and sport venues, not on the streets or newspapers telling me what I should do or think.

·         Each one of us should be able to receive according to our capacity to work, knowledge, and efforts.

·         Those who need –not those who want- should be able to receive help to satisfy their needs and get to the point of not needing.

·         We should all be able to have access to decent education; passing grades should not be given based on demographic needs, but on actual results. Education should improve the mind, not sink it into mediocrity.

·         Government sets the laws of the land; those in government should be held responsible for respecting and working with, and within, the scope of the very laws they propose and pass. Especially when some of these laws passed are not always in agreement with those citizens who voted them in. 

Utopian? Maybe… and then again, maybe not. Our seams are bursting at the edges, and we insist on continuing to burden society with more and more of the things that should not be a burden. How long can this nation and its structure take this abuse? I don’t know. I hope we don’t get to actually find out.

This human and political experiment we have come to know as the USA is still a beautiful example of what can be, when the people take a hand in shaping it; when the political types take a bit of time and pay attention to what it is those who elected them do want. It is a work in progress; I think we have strayed from the road our founding fathers meant us to take, but it is not too late yet to retake it and mend the mistakes.

 Will we? … Will our children?   Remains to be seen.

Be Well, Be Back.

 

QUOTE FOR THOSE WHO CHERISH LIFE.

 NOTE: in my ESL page on FB, I often put a quote and an accompanying “read” (my own). This one, however, was so impacting and so present, that I felt it should be put in the blog. I don’t know how many people may read this, but even if only one does, it is worth it.

 QUOTE FOR THOSE WHO CHERISH LIFE.

It has been a long, work laden week, leaving little time for putting content on FB. However, we must finish the week “in style”. Today is a running commentary and longer than usual, and it will bring us to the quote itself. 

Once in a while, I watch excerpts of some of those global talent shows and did so this week just to get my mind “cleared” for a while. It was a lucky decision, for it brought on one of those rare moments in which someone truly touches your heart and gives a life lesson. 

Her name (stage name) is “Nightbirde”; she is thirty but looks twenty. A beautiful smile and radiating pure joy and happiness. Even through the small smartphone screen, she made one feel good. She had brought a song written by her called “It’s OK” and, when asked about it, she said it reflected the last few years of her life. The song was bouncy and haunting at the same time and talked about life and time, especially about accepting the reality of all that goes on in one’s life. When finished, the panel had several questions for her.

I can’t remember all that was said, I wish I could. She let them know the song reflected her constant fight with cancer. When asked about her current status, she revealed the presence of some cancer in her back, liver and possibly lungs. “So… you are not truly OK” said one of the judges in the panel. She looked straight at him, and responded –“it is important that people know you are much more than just the bad things that happen to you”. That was the first quotable comment she had. And by itself, it’s strong enough to impact. But there was more.

She then revealed she had been given a 2% chance of survival. At the “gasp” reaction of the panel and public, she added… “but 2% is not 0%... is much more!”

Wow! Talk about not giving up.

The judges in the panel did not fully understand how someone who is basically condemned to die by an unrelenting illness, could still be so full of smiles and -apparently- peace. So they asked her how could she be radiating so much joy and happiness in the midst of this reality, and she replied…

“YOU CAN’T WAIT UNTIL LIFE ISN’T HARD ANYMORE,

BEFORE YOU DECIDE TO BE HAPPY”

This comment friends, truly impacted me. Being a CA survivor, I know that attitude is a major part of the battle. But to be able to face life when all seems lost and give your best to remain positive and able to fight on, is a life lesson. Of the highest order. There is much to be learned from this wonderful, vibrant, and truly -in the best sense of the word- alive person.

I can’t add much. Except to say that we can truly be in control, when we decide to be so, of our lives when, and if, we choose to live it to the fullest possible. Not letting circumstances dictate to us how we react.

Have a Wonderful weekend… God Bless… 

REMEMBER to like and follow the page… share it with your friends.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·        Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·        Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

MEMORIAL DAY, 2021

Today is Saturday. In truth a beautiful day, as days go. Sunny and warm, but not hot… there are several yard sales going on in the neighborhood, kind of like trying to get back into a quasi-normal lifestyle. But, no… I decided not to buy any more yards, since the one I already have is really giving me a run for my money trying to keep the grass down and the flowers up. 

Memorial Day is here and, as usual, many people are gearing up to having their barbeque ready for a cookout sometime during the three days. Most will give a passing thought to the reason for the holiday; some will take time and reflect on this and some, will only think of the hamburgers and/or chicken legs.

War is hell, somebody said wisely at some point. I am a veteran circa Viet Nam but was never on the front lines, shooting or being shot at. My closest work to this was being the point man on the riot control squad. We were involved in some minor action(s), since I was stationed on land that was considered then occupied territory from WWII. But I will never claim to be a front-line veteran; that would be insulting my fellow soldiers who were. And who in many cases paid the price for being there.

Where am I going with this? My efforts, as this is written, are geared to control my discontent and yes, true anger, at the message(s) put out by our current government. Apparently, one of the two highest ranking government members thinks this is a long weekend to take advantage of and “just have fun”. The other one is probably sleeping life away or trying to figure out where he is currently. 

I wonder how many widows and widowers, orphaned children, mothers and fathers and families who lost a loved one in service, will agree this is a weekend “just to have fun”. I do not care whether a war is “justifiable” (if ever one is) or not… These were men and women who answered a call to service, whether by being drafted or by volunteering, and who eventually paid the highest price for their responding to the call for this service to their country.

These men and women deserve nothing less than respect, honor and remembrance. Their families deserve nothing less than our gratefulness and our total and complete respect and support.

Apparently, some current government members think otherwise.

If you read this, please elevate a prayer on behalf of those departed men and women and their families. Don’t ever allow the present to ignore the past. No matter how much some people would like you to.

Be Well … Be Back!!! 

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

THE PRIVILEGE OF MAKING DECISIONS.

 

NOTE FROM THE “EDITOR-IN-CHIEF”. (also known as the the loud guy, janitor, gofer and overall do-it-all person)

As a language tutor, it is indeed my privilege to get to know my students fairly well, for most of the classes are on a one-on-one basis and it gives us ample face to face time. Also, some have been with me in one way or another or some time, so there is a friendly and trusting rapport which is established along the way. This, in turn leads the classes into occasional moments of quiet conversation or even guidance efforts (no, I am not a psychologist, just an old guy with a lot of years of people management experience) and with all the needed “caveats” in place, we talk.

This was the case this morning, in an individual class. I shared this in the school’s FB page and thought that it might be worth an inclusion in this hallowed (not “hollowed”) blog.

THE PRIVILEGE OF MAKING DECISIONS.

Very often we come to think, when a decision taken in best interests does not bring the desired results, that we are no good at making decisions, that we cannot hit a desired target even if it is huge and just a couple of feet away.

Don’t berate yourself; don’t put yourself into an “I’m no good at making decisions because they are all wrong” corner. We have all made decisions which have not brought the desired results. We cannot stop living at that point, we have to go on and continue to make choices and decisions.

Earlier today I was talking with one of my "senior" students and, as she was going on about some negative issues happening, she said "these are because of all my bad decisions along the way."

I just looked at her and said, "You know, there are no good or bad decisions, just decisions."

What do I mean by this? Whenever we make a decision, we make it based on the situation at the time, the information we have at that moment about that particular situation and our assessment then, as to what this decision will mean to us in a future time. 

No one EVER makes a choice intending for it to have a negative outcome. We constantly make decisions -some routine, some more life impacting- intending to have results which will bring us to a better place than where we stand at that moment.

The eventual outcome of any decision could be one of three: 1) a good outcome, 2) could be a “no change” outcome, or 3) could be negative outcome. If it is good; all is well. If it is indifferent, you may want to reassess the original decision and make another one at that moment. However, if the outcome has been negative, then you must go through a review of where you now are and make another decision to take a different or modified path in order to correct what has not worked. 

Does this make the original decision "bad"? No. Just means that it did not bring the desired outcome. That is all. Don't label yourself as a "bad" decision maker; this will create a very negative self-image and will seriously impair your ability to trust yourself in making choices in the future. 

Sometimes you may need a good friend or more experienced trusted individual to give you some guidance but, in the end, the actual decision will have to be in your hands, not someone else's.

Trust yourself; trust in the fact you are the best equipped person to make those decisions which will affect you. 

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

KNOW WHERE YOUR TRAIN (OR SHIP) IS GOING…

 There was this doctor I came to know while living in Chile for a year of Sundays, back in the 1980’s. That stay has been explored elsewhere in these meanderings, so I will just talk about the doctor, whom I will call Patricio (a good, solid name and not uncommon in Chile). He was a general practitioner and, as such, had been well recommended to us by a common friend. This turned out to be a good recommendation for he not only became our doctor, but eventually we struck a friendship with him and his family.

After some visits to his office, followed by the eventual striking of a friendly banter relationship, one day Patricio called me and asked whether we would like to come to their home for dinner with him and his wife. This was a way to formalize the friendship, as it were, for in Chile back then (God Lord, I’m beginning to sound like an old man… Don’t you say a word!!) society was managed by certain protocols; home invitations, when extended, were indicative of a desire to become better acquainted by allowing someone from “the outside” to come into their private home and personal realm.

Does it sound much too formal? To our current, overly relaxed parameters, it may be so. At that time, however, Chile’s society was in the process of readjusting to recently found freedom, for General Pinochet had been elected out of office (although by a small margin, he accepted this as the will of the people and stepped down) and many of the movement restrictions (especially in Santiago, the capital) and curfews had been lifted. Society was re-aligning its parameters of behavior, socialization and, in general terms, of life. But it was not an immediate mental and behavioral “herd” change; it took a bit of time.

Well, back to the visit. The appointed night arrived, and we left our children in the hands of a known babysitter, as we headed for the in-town home of our dear Dr. Patricio. What to bring with us was an easy to solve question. Chile has a well-known variety of high-quality wines, so it was one of these we brought with us. We arrived at the appointed time (no social time margins, for Chileans who -unlike their Argentinian neighbors- were time conscious) and were received by the Dr. and his wife Fernanda.

We were given the ground floor tour and, being winter, eventually made it to the living room, with an open fire chimney blazing and, where on the floor and to one side, were standing two open bottles of red wine, waiting for their time to be enjoyed. Patricio noted my inquiring glance and he said – “the bottles were being kept in a small cellar, and it is cold down there; we put the bottles here to bring them up to acceptable temperature for best notes”. There is a good wine culture in that country.

We had a good and ample dinner, where poultry was the primary element. It would then usually be this or sea-based fare. Beef was not a common element in those days for a) it was expensive and b) most people did not know how to prepare it well nor had a real taste for it. As an aside, in all of Santiago there were then only two beef restaurants. Of these, the British Pub was the only one where well-prepared beef dishes could be had.

We had finished dinner and aided by the second bottle of wine, were now engaged in full conversation. As it is usual on a first visit involving people from different parts of the world, the usual “tell us about your life” questions arose. We talked about Cuba, and the different places where we had lived since leaving (my then wife was also Cuban and had left the country as a young child with her mother) as well as places where we had visited and so on.

Then it was the good Doctor’s turn to talk. “We go to Chicago almost every year, for most of my relatives live in that area; I really only have a sister here.”. I then asked him how it was so. He looked somewhat wistful and went on with the story.

-“Our family came originally from the north of Germany.” – “Sometime back in the 1880’s -he continued- three brothers decided they wanted to emigrate to the new continent, establish a family and make a living here.”

“And how did you end here and all the rest of your family up in the States?” I asked.

He looked at me and said, “Our family, for the most part, was of humble origins; there were three brothers, my grandfather being the youngest.”

Then he continued “The two older brothers left first, leaving instructions (no smart phones back then…) for my grandfather to follow them when ready, to go to the port city and get onboard the ship that was going to America.”

“So he did” he continued… “about a month after his brothers had left, and after making ready, he went on to port where he was able to get -in exchange for work- a berth in a ship that was leaving for America”

Then he stopped for a moment, had a sip of wine, smiled and said “he never bothered asking where the ship was going, so no one told him its destiny was South America. Buenos Aires, to be exact.”

“Eventually he crossed over to Santiago and settled.” “And here we are.”

So, the moral of the story is… before you get on the train or, as in this case the ship, make sure you know it is going to the same place where you want to go.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

Wally’s Pond. A Perspective for a New Year

 

It has been sometime since I last sat by the water at Wally’s Pond. For those of you who have not been to Wally’s Pond before (actually, you have all been invited … you just haven’t joined me), let me tell you that it is a placid, tranquil place where the water is clean and clear, the birds chirp, there are no outside noises and it never rains. And in case you have not guessed it, this wonderful place is in my mind; the place where I sometimes manage to hide for a little while from all the unwanted events that are happening around me. And God only knows there have been plenty of those resonating in the last few months.

At my age, it is an achievement of sorts to be able to get by without any medications at all. Or so the doctors tell me. Blood pressure, heartbeat, oxygen count … check. Cholesterol, a tad high … not enough to worry about it. Weight … being managed. Yes, a few too many apple pies with ice cream but, hey … if we have to go down, let’s enjoy it!! 

The only way all these several health fronts are being held in abeyance on a continuing basis, is by retreating occasionally to this place of calmness where nothing annoying is allowed. And believe me, this is no easy task when surrounded by family, inside and outside problems, phone calls, deadlines and, yes, a cat and a dog staying here for a while. Notice I did not include “work” in that list. Luckily, my work is very enjoyable, so it actually allows me some time away from the other issues. 

In any event, it is only fitting that during the early part of the year you will find me here. There is so much to think about, so many knots to try and unravel. The funny thing is that, after sitting down at the water’s edge for a while, the knots begin to unravel without much effort and the view begins to clear.

Does this mean that there are now answers galore, where there were nothing but questions before?

No. Not really. What it means (to me, at least) is that perhaps all those issues clouding my mind are being shown to be not so important. That perhaps I can’t answer or solve all the problems of the known universe around me, that there are many of these that are within the purview of others and not mine to deal with.

Eventually, when this truth becomes clear and it is accepted, there comes a moment of calm and of understanding. Understanding that tells me that, no matter how much I may try to solve someone else’s problems, if the root of the problem within that person is not corrected by that very individual (something no one else can do for him/her) it will just grow and flourish again, and again.

It also becomes apparent that there are issues and shortcomings within myself I can correct and others which I may not be able to. The first batch will be dealt with, as quickly as possible. As far as the second batch, I must learn to accept them and work with them; to make them as least intrusive as possible, as time and self-awareness may allow this to be done. 

Finally, there are those other always present and “looming” issues which, after some scrutiny, are shown to be non important. Guess what? They immediately go into the disposal area of the mind, to be forgotten.

So, do you understand just how important is this pond to my own mental health? Not to mention keeping that blood pressure and heartbeat in check. Try it sometime. Find a spot where you can get away within yourself, even for a few minutes; whether you call it meditation or simply mental wanderings with a purpose, it will work wonders for you.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:

·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   

·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com