Monday, October 28, 2019

Then, there will be another one



Is that a real title? I don’t know. Probably not. As you can guess, I am trying very hard to get back on a “writing groove” -whatever that is- so as not to let far too much time go by between “appearances” on this “blog-stage”

Surprisingly, these entries are creeping up to the 20,000-hit mark, since they were first started as a “filler-of-time-while-recuperating-from-cancer-and-other-assorted-issues” hobby. Yes, I do understand there are many bloggers who will get that many “hits” on a daily basis but hey, let me enjoy the moment.

This blog was meant for a relatively small group of friends, who nicely told me they liked the way I wrote. They are/were also mostly from Cuba, the same as I, so the memories which were put on paper (Ok, digital paper!!) -although my own- were memories to which they could relate. And they did. That, combined with the fact that I spent then most days sitting or lying on my rehab bed, allowed me to give the blog the undivided time and effort it needed.

However, the algorithms of computing search kicked in, and suddenly there were readers in different parts of the world, places where I’d never think readers would appear. This made me very curious. To see how many countries would produce readers for a blog that, in essence, was meant as a personal travelogue through time and space. My own time and my own space. And yes, those with whom this time and space had been shared along the way, for they could read it and understand references and episodes lived, since they had lived similar ones.

Little by little, countries began to appear on that reader list. From South to Central and North America, to Europe and Asia. There were comments beginning to come in. Not all sweet and caring. But all comments were/are appreciated. Some from those friends who had shared this conceptual and real journey. Some encouraging me to put all these into a book format. Some telling me to leave “things” alone (still trying to figure out what “things” these folks were referring to) but the fact these regular people I don’t know took the time to read and to comment, was not lost on me.

It is said that a person (well, originally this said, “a man” but let’s be P.C.) should do three things while alive, to leave an impression of his/her passing through life: “plant a tree, travel, write a book”. I can vouch about having planted not one, but several trees and related living entities along the way. If you have followed this blog, then you know my travels have taken me around the world more than once.

And as for writing a book, technically, that has also been done. There is a book cataloged in the Library of Congress which includes my name as co-author. But I don’t really count this one, for it was a book on medical transcription and it was my first wife who really had the knowledge on this subject matter. She was an excellent, experienced medical transcription expert. I just helped with the editing and the putting together of the book.

This brings me back to said item. As mentioned somewhere in these -about 1,300 – 1.450- pages of “blogger-ing”, my forte is not long writing. I am not sure if it is short writing either. However, there is a compendium in the works, trying to put what I consider the better entries into a coherent format which, eventually, may or not see the light of day. This is up to about 400 double spaced pages which would probably translate into 220-240 regular printed pages. If it comes to pass, I guess enough will be printed to be given away to my children, so they don’t forget their roots. And some to my close friends… I’ll even sign them … Ok, maybe not.

There is another, longer shot also being slowly worked on … But that, is a totally different story.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:
·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   
·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

Friday, October 18, 2019

One More Anniversary



This morning I woke up with a heaviness in my mind and heart. I have been fairly busy lately, so it was assumed that perhaps this was the reason for this tired, but not quite tired feeling. Still in bed, but thinking about some strange, but unremembered dreams that have come along these past few nights and trying to make sense out of this whole scenario, I looked at my phone to see the time and noticed the date.

October 18th. The anniversary of my son Eric’s death as a result of an accident. Then I understood. In my heart I knew this was a special day, even if my mind – in its ever-ongoing effort of self-protection- chose to not recognize it right away.

The years go by and blur into a non-distinct date and time. It becomes a moment, a late evening phone call with news no parent wants to hear or should have to hear.

Is the hurt gone? No, not quite. Yes, time does have a way of lessening it, but it is an empty feeling that never goes, or will go away.

Memories? Many. Some great, some not so great, some painful, some happy. And yes, some not so happy. But then, this is the amalgam of life.

My clearest memory and the one which defines Eric for me, was his personal struggle to deal with the ever-present specter of addiction. Alcohol was his nemesis and it gave him his darkest moments as well as -I believe- his most shining moments.

In the latter years, he fought to regain his life and wrest it away from this nightmare. He managed to fight it to a functioning draw and this, in of itself, was a tremendous life triumph. This is my memory of him. Smiling, loving, working, regaining his self-respect and beginning to trust in the possibility that he had, after all, the right to a good future. This made him a winner.

In my eyes, he was -and will always be- a champion. So yes, he is gone from this physical world, but in my proud heart he will always live on and his smile will always shine.

Eric Charles, my son. R.I.P.

Be Well … Be Back!!!

Final Notes:
·       Pray for those who are fighting an illness which may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and counts!!   
·       Any comments please send to rjalcazar@gmail.com

IS “HATRED” VALID?

According to the Oxford Dictionary, hate (verb) / hatred (noun) mean: 1.       To feel ( to hate ) intense or passionate dislike ( hatred ...