Some
days go by faster; some seem to drag on like a slowly moving turtle making its
way from one side of the road to the other … all the time expecting a car to
ride right over the swaying banner-like head…
Grant you that I neither look like a turtle nor
do I make my way slowly across the road. Usually, my steps are quick and my
face looks ahead, so much so, that I have been accused of being “stuck up” by
those who walk around with a fixed stare looking down at the ground, and who make, of assuming a judgment, a pastime. This step comes
due to different reasons, the main one is perhaps that when being tall and
getting older, it becomes extremely easy to bend over and then remain that way.
A constant effort (like at this very
moment) is usually made to straighten my back and to sit or stand straight…
Remember your mom, when you were a mere child, asking you to stand straight all
the time? Well … she was right. It seems that as we get older, the combination
of, well, you know… all those things that spell A-G-E like creaky joints,
slight pains, lesser populated top-of-head (did
say “top” not insides), eyes that refuse to focus on anything that is less
than 4 feet away, difficulty in losing those extra 5 pounds, etc… will begin to
collect a toll.
I don’t know why this is finding its way unto this
empty screen; maybe because as I sit here some of the aforementioned age
reminders are bugging me. Or maybe it is that there is not much else that comes
to mind at this moment. It has been a regular day with its regular ups and
downs, not too many issues have come up and not too many should, in what is
left of the day. Actually, I am looking forward to dinner tonight. As I was
talking to my cousin on Sunday, she asked where I actually lived. When I told
her, she said “Oh … My daughter just came
in today and she will be there for a few days, on a business trip” This
particular daughter I saw last when she was being a 9-11 year old “sweet brat”
and in the middle of a “fight” with her sister… She now works with a major
German multinational and has come here to do some housecleaning on behalf of
her employer. She is now (I guess) some 30-ish years old, living in Germany
It is really amazing when we look at our lives
and see all the turns and byways we have taken and traveled over the years. It
would have been unthinkable for me at age 10 or so as my sister and our
cousins, including tonight’s young lady’s mom (actually, she is the one who was in that swimming picture published a
couple or three entries ago) would get together in the summers, to think
that our lives would take such a major deviation in the not so distant future.
Over the years, we, collectively, have lived in well over 10 countries,
traveled the world over a few times and lost our own roots along the way. Had
we stayed, our lives would have gone on over defined rails into a defined future, albeit with a given hump
here and there, much as our forbearers had lived and done.
Sometime ago, in taking stock of my life, it came
to my attention that many years ago, upon our departure from Cuba, familial
culture had been traded for a secured future. A future which has really not
been that secured after all. Not due to anything other than my own mistakes
along the way; seldom has there been a negative issue which I could blame on
circumstances or on others. That is, if the assessment was done correctly. Not
excuses; there are myriads of these we can count on, to be used and abused
every day. They come in all sizes and shapes, our imagination being the only
limit. I refer to real reasons and causes; the ones we will try and sweep under the
rug at the least provocation.
Going back to the rails… in trading familial
culture, there was rather large void which formed in my life. There were
several people along the way who did their incredible best to help me, without
really knowing this was the deeper issue they were tackling. My guess is that these
great folks helped me in getting out of that particular hole, without allowing
me to fall even more into it, much further than I already had. My relationships have
definitely reflected this, though; there is a point of fear of immersion, where
going deeper into the sharing of lives becomes an internal issue and increases
the difficulty of further developing said relationship. As I have discussed
this with some friends who are professionals in the field (don’t ask which), they tell me that I have managed the
repercussions well. I guess. They know
more than I do about this … or not?
Everything we live through in life, adds to the
baggage carried. There are many lessons from life; some are sweet and loving,
others are very harsh and hurting. There are times when the accumulated baggage
takes a toll on our ability to think through what we are trying to resolve at
any given time. We need a bit of time off; we need those moments when the mind
can sort of shake off the cobwebs, look and see through the actual issue being
faced and go back into that accumulation of stories and histories, looking for
that bit of stacked information which lurks somewhere in the aggregate dustbins
amongst the gray cells and which should help us solve this … whatever it is…
What are the simple issues in life? Depends on
the wearer … what to me is simple may be awfully complicated for someone else,
and what for me could be complicated, might be "silly easy" for that very
person. We are all incredibly simple at birth; that is, simple as empty
containers could be. As we grow, more and more stuff (remember George Carlin’s great routine about “stuff’? ... remember George Carlin, for that matter?) finds its
way into that container, cluttering the all. Every once in a while a sort of a
purge happens, I’m not sure how, but a little more space is made for more
stuff. As we get older, all this “stuff” intermingles and it may become “messy
stuff” at times. But we learn to live and work with it and, sometimes, actual flashes of brilliance actually come through.
Experience is a hard task master; we go through
the good and the bad, often without realizing these are the school of life. We
are supposed to learn, digest, file and have at our call these learned bits and
pieces so, when the time comes, we can use them in a coherent manner.
Life can be complicated, no? And life can also be
simple… in the end, it is just what we make of it. Live, Learn, Cry, Laugh, Yell,
Whisper, Jump, Lie Down ... Be yourself, let others like you … or not, but be true
to your own self. You are who you can count on when the chips are down … everyone else becomes just a wonderful
support cast.
Be well … be Back!!!
Final Notes:
- Pray for those who are fighting an illness which
may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and
counts!!
- Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora…
- Any comments please send to otherboxp@yahoo.com; it comes
directly to me. I promise to read all coming messages, and answer as many
as I can.
- Remember: We are “On Air” every Sunday night at
6:30pm EST (GT –5hrs). http://www.blogtalkradio.com/theotherbox If the link does not work, please just copy and paste
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