For most of us
the above title will probably conjure up visions of dying or, at best a
definite good bye, whoever is parting never to be seen again.
Some
years ago, while in the midst of all the comings and goings generated by the
elsewhere mentioned pursuit of our own version of the “holy grail”, there were
some instances when the above little phrase/statement was indeed the telling of
what should have been done. It has been an unforgiving road, but one which I am
sure has prepared me for something that needs to be yet accomplished. This goal
has been known to me since the moment 13 years ago when the idea first came
into my mind. Every time the thought of saying “goodbye” comes into play, a new
indication that the fight must continue strongly materializes. So, my heart and mind are still trained on this goal and I have quietly come to realize that yours
truly does not easily give up.
Remember
my friend Chuck? From a couple of entries back…? He is but one of several folk
whom I have known through these meanderings and who have died along the way. Before
their time, to be sure, but not before they added their little grain of sand to confirm
the reason for the pursuit.
There
are others who survive on, but who are no longer physically well; I wish there
was something I could do to help them. Sort of looking after a trench mate …
much like an army buddy who, in the middle of a tight spot, watched your back
and you his. After all, these wars fought in locales like Zurich ,
Geneva , Paris , Rome , Frankfurt and so
on, have been every bit as bloody as any where bullets flew. At least in the
latter you had a chance to identify the enemy so as to defend yourself.
When
a road is chosen at some point in our lives, we often overlook the
potential pitfalls it presents. Perhaps we simply do not know them or, worse,
choose to ignore the reality of their existence because the assumed potential gain is
greater than the presumed and unknown risk. When this choice comes along at
some point in life should we then as individuals retire into a cocoon and, in
order to minimize any and all risks, let life go by?
There
are those who being sensible and cautious will say that perhaps, without going
that far, steps should be small and careful. There are others for whom risk
taking is the elixir of life, that which will bring the color and heat of excitement
to their hearts and minds. Then, there are the rest of us. We will look to the
adventure and changes it may bring about, but will also consider the extent (some, anyway) of the risk involved in
whatever it is we are about to engage.
An
apt description of individual rights and freedom goes something like this: “the rights of a person end where the rights
of his/her neighbor begin” How true!! It is not an uncommon situation to
make decisions about our lives and explaining them away as “Well… it is my
life, isn’t it?” Well, yes and no. When
decisions made affect those who are around you, sharing their lives with your
own, then one will be infringing into their territory and also into their
rights as that invisible but very real line is crossed.
How
many times have we actually crossed that line in our life? To be sure, we can
probably name those occasions when the offending party is another person; can
we be as clear as to the times when we have been that offending party? Probably
not.
What
is the source of this post? Time and timing. As we choose the roads we travel,
whether we endeavor to navigate these waters quietly or to constantly leave a
wake behind, we should try to identify just when it is that we may have broken
that invisible line and stepped on the other person’s toes; this signals the
point where that individual’s rights begin and our rights simply become wrongs.
Many a good relationship has found its end because one (or both) of the
partners constantly ignores this fine line, expecting the other person to
accept and to support. This may actually happen for a while but, eventually,
the weight of discontent will wear out the acquiescence generated by the
feelings that may be present.
We
don’t travel life’s roads by ourselves, no matter how lonely we may choose to
feel in order to justify a drab stretch. Take the time to identify those you
know and who can be put in a circle of family members, a circle of friends, a
circle of coworkers, and so on. Several may –and probably should- overlap. As
we do this, we come to realize that every decision made will affect a number of
those who appear on this overall picture. Obviously, priorities being what they should
be, family comes first. Whatever affects other family members should be discussed
with them; especially if this family member is the one defined as “spouse”.
Don’t
be afraid to “let your hair hang out” and to take the high road every so often.
Life can be very boring otherwise; but, as you do this, be sure that you can
honestly go back to the moment when the decision was made and bring forward the
fact that issues were a known factor and a joint (if there is a partner) decision was made. This will
make life, in the long run, a much more pleasant place to be.
So, as much as you might have your heart set on sailing around the world in a skiff made for two … you may have to accept it may not be the best idea after all ... for now, anyway!
Be
Well … Be Back!!!
Final Notes:
- Pray for those who are fighting an illness which
may take them away from their loved ones… Every request is heard, and
counts!!
- Follow us on Twitter … @RJAsPandora
- Any comments please send to otherboxp@yahoo.com
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