Cuando un Amigo se va...

The title above means: “When a Friend is Gone…” it is the title of a well-known folk song which tells us, among other things, that a friend gone cannot be simply replaced by a new friend; too much has been invested in the relationship. News of an unexpected death this past week end and, especially the manner of the same, comes through on this posting. Some thoughts…

Last weekend this bit of news flashed throughout the Spanish speaking world like a huge rolling tsunami: Facundo Cabral, age 74, internationally beloved Argentinean folk singer, had died as a result of a gunman’s attack in Guatemala while on his way to the airport. At first, it was difficult to digest. This man had traveled and performed songs of love, life and peace in more than 150 countries over a singing career spanning more than five decades and, in 1996, was UNESCO’s Peace Ambassador. He had just finished two presentations and was on his way to the airport, to go on to his next stop…

Every morning we start a new day during which we are exposed to a number of risks but, much like living in a seismic area, 99% of the daily movements go unnoticed. However, once in a while a big one comes along and does serious damage. Most of the risks we face on a day to day basis go unnoticed; the simple crossing of a busy corner is a risk factor, but we see it as a routine issue. Don’t even think twice about it… until that moment when an out of control car comes through at the same time.

The fact is we live on borrowed time from our birth; we must try and enjoy every minute. Yes, we all make plans for the future and more often than not some of these are actually completed, and with a well deserved feeling of accomplishment. Yet, what we all too often fail to do is to allow ourselves the enjoyment of the road we travel because we are too busy looking ahead. Every step, every detour; every passageway which we must uncover and often find blocked at the other end… every pothole. These should not become an issue of frustration, but part of a learning process; a process of enrichment and betterment.

I, like most who mourn his passing, didn’t know Cabral personally; yet, through his beautiful and meaningful songs, I came to feel over the years that he was known to me so, in essence, we feel that a life long companion has been taken away. To my English speaking friends who read these entries: Facundo Cabral was to the Spanish speaking world, what Harry Chapin might have become to English listeners had he not died so young, and had he stayed true to his roots. Both had the same kind of home and life lyrics, almost poetry, and the same style of delivery.

Many years ago my best friend from my childhood years, Quique, came to the states with his family to seek the promise of freedom and a better future. He started to work in Miami, married and fathered three children. This was about the time I learned of his being in the US, and we made some plans to reunite for the first time in several years. He worked for a security carrier and had been promoted to supervisory duty, no longer in the field. One Saturday night, some 3 weeks prior to our planned meeting, a field carrier called in sick and he chose to go substitute, for he didn’t want to bother his other guy who was on vacation. After all, it was a routine pick up. That night, for the first time in many months the truck was intercepted and, in the resulting shoot out, he died in the line of duty. Wrong place, wrong time? Cabral, much like my friend Quique, wasn’t even supposed to be in the assaulted vehicle; it was a last minute offer made by the man who was the intended target. He survived; Cabral died.

It is my rooted belief that physical death is simply the process of our spiritual energy passing on to a different plane of existence. It should not come as an ending to a life of frustrations and be seen as a sad parting but should be a celebration of a life well lived, whether long or short. I am not a “utopian”; there are indeed very tough and seemingly, at the time, insurmountable moments in anyone’s life, but it is the manner in which each person “manages to manage” these difficulties which will set him/her apart from others. Enjoy the road, no matter how difficult it may get at times; do “smell the roses” and watch the sunsets (and sunrises) along the way; enjoy the triumphs, no matter how small they may seem. Deal with the adversities and they will, in most cases, shrink to a very manageable size. This way of life will give you a much more productive and happier travel time.

Cabral died at 74; he had a pretty full and rewarding professional life; my friend Quique died barely into his 30’s. His children never had him as they grew, at least not as a physical presence. My youngest step-son (a gifted song writer in his own right) is fond of saying: “We are all going to die at some time; we simply don’t know where we stand in the waiting line”. Shows much understanding for a guy in his 20’s…

Be Well… Be back!!